Twitter: @InnerLiberation

I was raised a Sufi Muslim. My mother, Gwendolyn Zoharah Simmons, is a founding member of the Shaikh Muhammad Raheem Bawa Muhaiyaddeen Fellowship. I grew up practicing Dhikr and performing salats. I fasted annually during the holy month of Ramadan. As a teenager, I participated in the building of the Mosque of Shaikh M. R. Bawa Muhaiyaddeen. My most recent ancestral maternal and paternal roots, however, are grounded in the Baptist and African Methodist Episcopalian (AME) Churches. Throughout my rearing, I’ve spent many a powerful Sunday in church with grandmothers, great aunts, and cousins. Additionally, I attended Quaker schools and camps during part of my formative years, and both of my divorced parents worked for the American Friends Service Committee throughout my entire life up until my early 30s. This meant I attended (silent) Meeting for Worship on a regular basis.

Throughout my journey called life, I have witnessed and experienced the universality of the Ultimate Truth. As a result, I embrace all spiritual and religious traditions that teach and practice the Ultimate Truth.

I’m a student of and practitioner of the teachings of Buddha through Vipassana Meditation, as taught by S.N. Goenka in the tradition of Sayagi U Ba Khin. In December 2002, I took my first 10-day Vipassana Meditation course. It was a transformational experience. I experienced this universal, non-sectarian technique/practice to be one (not the only) way to lead to ones own personal liberation.

Since my first course, I’ve been sitting and serving courses; and establishing a practice of sitting everyday, twice a day, for an hour at each sitting. This was not, and at times, it is still not an easy feat for me at all. However through lived experiences over the 9-years since my first 10-day course, I’m learning that my daily practice of sitting must be non-negotiable. As one cleanses one body daily, I believe that one must work diligently and consistently to purify the mind. A daily 2-hour practice sometimes barely cleans the surface, let alone the depths.

The essence of the teachings of Buddha that each one of us is responsible for our own salvation and liberation, in this lifetime, resonates with me most deeply. Buddha focused on the here and now. In this very moment-to-moment to moment each one of us can experience true liberation from within. Vipassana, which means to see things as they really are, is a non-sectarian, universal technique of self-purification, which has been continuously taught in its pristine purity for over 2500 years.  Through this practice I am learning that with equanimity, I can objectively and consistently observe my thoughts, words, and actions as opposed to consistently reacting to my and others thoughts, words, and actions. This, to me, is true freedom. Regardless of what happens on the outside, I’m in control of what happens on the inside.  When I write, I’m in control of what happens on the inside, I mean I’m in (or, more appropriately I’m *very slowly* learning how to be in) control of my mind without reacting with craving or aversion. Mind matters most. 

For example, as a person who embodies multiple identities, (including, Black-Woman- Lesbian who is both an Incest Survivor and Rape Survivor) which are marginalized and oppressed in the US and globally, I am empowered knowing that, regardless of what’s going on, on the outside, living with true inner peace, is always possible. My understanding of the teachings of Buddha is that I cannot necessarily control or even end (in my lifetime) racism, sexism, homophobia/heterosexism, and/or gender-based violence (to name some of the global atrocities) however, every single moment (to moment to moment) I have an opportunity to not give my innate power away as a result of these vicious and atrocious forms of oppression. This should never ever be misunderstood or misconstrued as excusing or condoning oppression at all… Absolutely. Positively. Not. 

I will continue to dedicate my life towards ending all forms of oppression. However, each moment, I will strive to work with equanimity and mettā (infinite pure *non-attached* loving kindness and compassion) so that I don’t destroy myself in the process and become exactly what I’m working towards ending.